Bully Bully

The motto handed down from my parents, my community and church was to treat people the way you wished to be treated, as in the Golden Rule.   The bully stereotype has always been some big ugly cuss who wants to pick on weaklings and kick sand in their face. So flipping this adage on its head, I guess a bully wants to be bullied.

In our contemporary world, unfortunately, it’s much more subtle than that.   We are exposed to constant bullying via the media particularly Fox News and its many hatemongers as well as the billionaire corporate architects behind the Tea Party.  You know, Karl Rove, the Koch Brothers, Grover Norquist, Dick Army, et al.  Ever since Obama came in office, the public has been bullied to, in most cases, vote against our self-interest by putting the Republicans back in power who were majorly responsible for creating the mess we’re in—yes w/ help from some of the Democrats.  After all, Big Money trumps all.

Enough of the big picture though.  I’m more annoyed by the small ‘p’ politics:  pettiness, envy, negativity, the small-mindedness which now thrive in the horrible big ‘p’ political atmosphere.  This  atmosphere germinates Bullies, because they always pick on those they perceive as having less status then themselves. Why?  Because the bully wouldn’t want to take the chance to lose their job, a valuable connection or a valued friend by taking on someone perceived to be above them. In the  classic TV show Seinfeld, it used to be called a “George moment”:  Someone socially eviserates you in a compromising situation. First, you barely realize it till later that you’ve been dissed bigtime, and second, don’t have the momentary sharp wit to respond accordingly and extract yourself gracefully. 

So to nip in the bud this widespread, ugly, practice and even the score w/ your abuser I’ve come up with a response I call “holding the mirror up.”   When my instinct kicks in to let me know I’ve been/am being disrespected, I release myself from the Golden Rule and let my angry freak flag fly though I try to keep my composure when doing this for max effectiveness.  My very diplomatic Dad used to call it “the needle”—to pop the bubble of pompous self-importance. 

The reason I’m so in tune w/ bullying is because of my PTSD that was provoked by the bullying of the federal gov’t that drafted my ass during the Vietnam War and subsequently screwed w/ my life and  reputation.  So I have a hair trigger when it comes to knowing when I’ve been put down.  Unfortunately it’s hard to practice holding up the mirror everytime because often you can be in an  aforementioned compromised and delicate position w/ potential  negative consequences attached.   So you have to go home and lick  your wounds and figure things out and reclaim your self-worth.

Here’s the quote that sums things up:  Comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.  Don’t be a bully and kick down, be brave:  Kick up.